Wednesday, June 9, 2010

AVATAR: A Review


Was there some other movie last year called Avatar? I remember everyone raving about this fabulous movie that was going to redefine cinema. Surely, this is not the same Avatar I just watched. The one that takes place on some planet called Pandora.

First of all, it stole the plot line from a 2nd rate animated movie from the 1990s, FernGully. Every character was as shallow a belly-button swimming pool. You got the gung-ho military guy who only wants to kill and blow stuff up. You also have the corporate CEO, who only cares about profits ... so if you have to kill and blow things up, fine with him. You have the researchers, who are compassionate human beings and self-righteous. And then, you have this indigenous population called Na'vi, whose so-called culture is nothing more than recycled Native American ("Injuns," they used to be called in Hollywood, when they were played by dark-skinned Jews or Italian actors) traditions.

For a movie billed as so inventive, how did I know the entire plot within 10 minutes. How could I recite the dialogue before the characters even uttered the words? This is a 45-minute film stretched to almost 3 hours.

Stay away from this piece of excrement, and someone please direct me to that other Avatar movie everyone was talking about.

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